Ranting away

So Im ranting again, and Im going to sound like a hypocrite, and I feel kind of like a jerk, but truth be told I am a jerk so what does it matter...
I was kind of on this "get over yourself" thought about some people who are all "pity me, Ive been hurt" and BS like that, but then, over the weekend, some things came up about my ex, and I realized how not okay I am with that situation.
And its horrible to find out that the person you thought you were going to spend the rest of your life with, that you were with for a good amount of time, lived together, vacationed together, incorporated into your family and vice versa, is not who you thought they were. Coming to learn that the person I loveD (past tense to be clear, since people keep asking) is a liar, is selfish and truly only cares about herself (I guess that is what selfish means, but I need to emphasize the point) is rather hurtful... And what does it say about me, knowing that I could love someone like that... She comes in and out of my life on her terms, reaking havoc as she comes, taking what she wants, and all the while claiming to be a good friend to me. Um, wtf?
So yeah, I guess I do understand the people who say they've been hurt before, and it really messed them up, BUT Im not going to let her rule my life, Im not going to let her be "happy" while I sit and suffer in the wake of her disaster...
Oh and for something fun, I just realized that I recieved the "Its not you, its me speech" and I didnt even realize it... It wasnt until they "broke some news" to me last night, that it officially registered that although they seemed like they were genuinely trying to tell me something last week, what they were really saying was "its not you its me" funny thing is, all I did was ask what was going on with us, because I didnt want to mistake it for something it was or was not.
And then there is the girl who seems genuinely interested, but is so busy that she ends up being very last minute with asking me to do things, and Im not the last minute type... Maybe I need to fix that?

Okay thats all for now,
Peace out girl scout(ers)
angry bee